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Keeping the peace as best we can."
Dear Dr. Fortran,
Have any new elements been discovered in this decade?
Perry Oddick
Yes, two new elements have been detected in recent years.
Researchers at the Beau Wring Institute have discovered a substance called Tedium. They have been hunting for it for years and would have found it earlier except they kept falling asleep while searching for it.
Also found this decade is a hallucinatory gas called delirium. Victims, er, subjects exposed to the fumes suffer acute schizophrenia with delusions of grandeur. The only known quantities of this gas have been detected seeping from the ground in and around Washington, DC. This in itself should explain a great number of things.
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